Hey, this is Shane, I play bass and sing on "Don't Wanna Be (Daniel Johns)". I have been having tons of fun, laughing evilly every day at our guestbook at poor, pathetic whiny Silverchair fans. Ha! Ha! There I go again! I also have really been getting a kick out of beating the hell out of anyone who mentions liking the band, or burning houses down that contain Frogstomp or Neon Ballroom. It's just fun! However, I recently read a guestbook entry that really hit home... a revelation of sorts. So I'd just like to say sorry. Y'see, I thought i was just making fun of someone who didn't exist, but this signing made me understand Daniel Johns is a real person. Here's an excerpt:

Comments: Screw you guys! Your band sucks! FUCK YOU! Daniel Johns Rules!!! Fuck you all! This band, THE YSIB sucks!!!! It's a shit!

No... wait... that was the one that made me not understand. Oh, here it is!

Where are you from:Canada

I can't believe your actually making fun of Daniel. Why do you guys think silverchair sucks?

When I first read this guestbook post, I laughed heartily. Ha! She doesn't know the proper usage of "your"!! Stupid Canadian. However, I gave her a second chance and read further....

You don't just go around and make fun of people with diseases like anorexia.

He's a person? I read further....

He's already paranoid enough as it is, and now you come with your 'Don't wanna be Daniel Johns' song. Seriously, can't you give him a break? Leave him alone.

You're right! While I thought maybe we were having fun with someone's celebrity persona, I have to realize he's a real person. I have to be sensitive. In fact, in the future, I should stop making fun of anything; assuredly there's someone out there in the world who is scarred for life because of the subject of my joke, and I hold so much influence in life, my words can be like daggers in the hearts of even the strongest men. In fact, just thinking about a cute baby that was born to an alocholic makes me want to put an end to any more jokes involving alcohol. Wait. Anorexia isn't even mentioned in the song! Maybe i misread! Still, she gave some very insightful points, so I read further...

Do you think your cool because your making fun of a celebrity? Or do you just want attention to get your band noticed? Your getting noticed all right, but not in the good way.

Very true! In a world where smut is battling to top smut, someone needs to step up and do the Right Thing. And while bigger issues can be fought, like perhaps the fast-food chains that peddle a horribly corrupt meat industry, EVERY ISSUE should be handled, and negative songs are a good place to start! And while bigger bands could be brought to attention, even the SMALLEST BANDS should handle themselves accordingly! It's kinda like communism! I think....

Don't be surprised if one day some guy or girl with a real silverchair obsession finds out where you live and totally trashes your place, or even tries to kill you. There are people like that. I don't know any, but I'm sure there are. You'd better get some bad-ass security system set up.

I never thought of that! But reading the guestbook, there seems to be plenty of ignorant psychos who would probably do insane things to defend a band they don't even know. However, I also noticed as many of them don't even know how to type correctly, they probably do not know how to travel, or possibly even communicate with fellow human beings, so fortunately I have a bit of stall-time to work on a security system. Thank you for the warning!!

What is your favorite YSIB song? None. Your lead singer is straining so much he sounds like he's trying to take a shit.

I listened again, and it's true. All those voice lessons down the drain! My lifelong dream! Wait..I haven't taken voice lessons, nor do I care about singing. But it's still true!

Which YSIB member is the most attractive? You guys are all fucking ugly. Loose some weight, you all look like pigs.

Now, now, watch it Patricia! Being that I am very underweight already, I could be very weight-conscious! In fact, that downright negative statement makes me wish I was anorexic. Now I know how your man feels.

So, in light of those comments, I stayed up for days to create a new and improved "WE Wanna Be (Daniel Johns)". Unfortunately, I didn't have access to a microphone, but that will be coming soon! For now, you'll have to download the original song and sing the revised lyrics yourself! Enjoy, and WE'RE SORRY!!

WE Wanna Be (Daniel Johns)

there is this guy from silverchair
he plays guitar, he has blonde hair
he writes songs and he really does care
about pressing issues everywhere

we really love
daniel johns
i want to sing every one of his songs
i'd like to sing like him
i'd like to write like him
i really love daniel johns

once, during a concert, he got hit with a bottle
people say "he's so punk rock, he's my role model"
it's true: being punk rock is being hit with a bottle
silverchair is now my role model

we really love
daniel johns
i want to sing every one of his songs
i'd like to sing like him
i'd like to write like him
i really love daniel johns

i bet you weren't expecting us to change this song
you guys were right, YSIB was wrong
and just to show that we really do care
we're becoming a cover band, of silverchair

reading the guestbook gave me pains
sharp-witted fellows calling us lame
our integrity is what we hope to reclaim
i hope they don't think we're worse than staind

i want to be daniel johns
i want to sing Tomorrow, and Ana's Song
i'm trying to sing like him
i've tried to write like him
i'll never be daniel johns
daniel johns
ana's song
ana's song
throw your hands in the air!